The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it. you will be lonely often. and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself ... Fredrich Nietzsche

I spent the first 16 or 17 years of my life fighting it seems .. almost from the time I was born I had to prove I deserved to belong like everyone else .. whether I was chubby or I didn't have the right shoes on or I didn't like the same shit as everyone else did .. to say my goofy ass looked like a mark was an understatement .. and certain kids or even adults zone in on that shit and use it to make you feel like your an outcast or try and use it to subjugate you to their supremacy as if they are better just because they are part of the crowd or perceive themselves as better than you for whatever reason

Now you can live with this .. and live beat down and defeated which ive done a time or two no bullshitting about it .. or you can say look .. your not gonna treat me like this and if you do your gonna pay for it one way or another .. sad to say a lot of people just wont stop when they see you as weak and better than you and they continue in their mistreatment .. and im sad to say when I was younger more often than not it would turn violent .. you gonna life with the names they hurl at you ? how many titty twisters are you gonna eat ? you maybe but by the time I was 7 or 8 years old I was done with that shit and that's when my life started getting violent .. I learned that a swollen lip a black eye or a busted nose was nothing compared to the pain you live with if you let it continue and do nothing .. the looks and the snickers the name calling people taking things from you like your nothing

So you take a stand you fight you don't become a victim you don't become bitter and meaner than your tormentors .. you stand the fuck up you set boundaries and you fight like a mother fucker you earn that dignity you earn that respect .. doesn't matter if you win the fight no one wins that shit someone if not everyone gets in trouble but people start to learn that there is a price to pay for mistreatment ..

I never wanted like that .. I love to laugh and make others laugh im a born joker and kidder .. lets tell jokes and have fun .. eat drink and be merry ya know .. But nope couldn't be that way .. all yea here is mother fuckers hollering across the school hey lard ass how was your trip boom badda boom badda boom .. you know from the movies .. funny now but then that was hurtful shit that would make you hunt up the dude later on and give him a chance to say it to your face and if he didn't youd still go in on him cause he was a coward and thought he was something plus like I said living with that kinda shit everyday is total and utter fucking misery and id rather be in trouble than live with that shit .. id throw the first and the last punch every time and once again id find my fat ass up shits creek with no paddles in sight

Thank god I had great parents .. theyd tell me you cnt fight everyone son sooner or later your gonna run into that bully that fucks you up real good .. so its best to find a new way to go about things .. so I got into sports and gaining more confidence a cliché I know lol and I started learning to talk .. I had the god given ability to talk the gift of gab some call it and natural timing so I got to where I could talk my way outta shit with a joke or a sales job of how bad I was gonna fuck someone up for the simple fact being in trouble all the time is just fucking horrible and finding yourself doing someone elses time is the fucking pits ...

I don't have any answers for any of these issues just the shit ive been through .. this shit has gone on since the dawn of humanity .. someone thinks they are better and they try and prove on those they see as weaker .. its up to you if you live with it .. and if you can maybe that's your answer cause it sure as hell was never mine ...

V Nasty